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Saturday, June 7, 2014

Sometimes life just sucks!

No...this isn't going to be a light and fluffy post.  This week was emotionally draining for me so I don't even want to think what it must be like for the children involved.

When I think of children being abandoned I just don't understand.
I cannot imagine a single reason that can justify choosing life on the streets over your children.
I cannot imagine leaving behind children that I carried under my heart for 9 months.
It must the single most selfish thing anybody can do.

The parents have been in and out of the Mission for the past 6 years.  Both addicted to crack cocaine.  The moment they would be back on their feet they left...just to fall into drugs again...and then back onto the program at the Mission.  Something we have learned over the past 16 years is that some addicts will have to live in a controlled environment for the rest of their lives.  They can never trust themselves and need to be protected against themselves.

In this case the parents were not prepared to come back onto the program.  The mother would leave during the late hours of the night to "babysit" and return again early in the morning.  One morning she was attacked while picking up newspapers at a taxi rank. (The story they told us)  The truth was that this could only be true if the mother called the customers that picked her up "baby"...and she was beaten up by three other prostitutes because she was on their territory.  The truth is that she is using again...and the awful cycle of drug addiction and prostitution had taken over her life.

They wanted to leave and we couldn't allow them to take their children onto the street with them...so they abandoned their children.  They have four children.  The oldest, a daughter of 12, a son of 7 (already in foster care), a son of 4 and a baby of six weeks.

We had a meeting with the Social Services and the procedure is lengthy before any decisions are made.  In the mean time we have to place the children privately and try and get the baby registered.  Oh my hat, I didn't mention that...the baby wasn't registered at birth and cannot be placed without a birth certificate.  The children are with their biological aunt until after this weekend.  The aunt has already mentioned that she is not prepared to take the girl in long term.  We don't know whether it is because the girl is of mixed race (other than her brothers) or whether she just doesn't want to deal with a broken teenage girl.

So that was my emotionally draining week and my reality...I bet your reality is way different.

xx

19 comments:

  1. This just breaks my heart for everyone involved. Please know that those precious children and you are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  2. I am so sorry .... this just breaks my heart for them and for you....

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  3. oh my gosh, that is very sad! I can't even imagine.

    No wonder you're drained.

    Puts that power outage right into perspective :)

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  4. Prayers to you & the children.....breaks my heart! As a mother and grandmother, I can't imagine how a person could abandon their own children. I think of all of the women, that for whatever reason, can't have children of their own and have prayed to God for a child...so hard to understand. As always, bless you for your hard work.

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  5. Sad to realise just how much drugs and alcohol can control another human ... Die duiwel se speelplek

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  6. Awful. And it's going on all the time, all over the world. And there's no answer. And those kids' lives are broken before they can even [maybe, hopefully] begin to mend. Makes me feel blessed that my boys didn't end up like these parents - & it's pretty much a lottery ----- hope it can get sorted so that the parents can't just come on by & pick up their kids & create havoc.....

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  7. Thinking of you as you nurture the broken and desperate people in your area. Suffer the little children.....

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  8. Oh. How awful. So sorry that you had to deal with that. I would be totally, emotionally drained by it.

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  9. Oh my.. You have tugged my heart so much being the mum of an adopted daughter having persevered 8 years of red tape and government departments.. I know of family's who would do nearly anything to have a family of children. It is so very heart breaking for the children what emotional damage for them to be left at these ages. I had read somewhere that Australia was under taking a move to open the doors for oversea adoption to South Africa but still such a sad thing for you this week. Sending my love and pray God will place these fatherless with family as He says He does.. Xx

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  10. You and Kobus have a very special place in heaven for the work that you do. Without people like you this world would be a very bleak and sad place for those children.

    Sending much love, light and strength your way. Know that people like me appreciate you more than you will ever know or understand!

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  11. How wonderful that there are people in the world to do what you do. Indeed there are some very undeserving parents out there. Each of us is fighting our own battles yet mostly people have no consideration for others hardships so good on you.

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  12. Terrible! So sad to hear! Thanks for sharing and caring!

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  13. Ai Lynette - heartbreaking! At least they have you

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  14. I've told you before and I will tell you again!! I am soo impressed with you and people like you who'll go to great lengths to help people. The world would be a so much better place if more people were like you! This said I understand full well the frustration you feel when the people you try to help are not prepared to help themselves. I feel for those innocent little children and hope that all will work out for the best.....

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  15. How heartbreaking when little ones are caught in the middle of such turmoil. I don't know how you cope with seeing the cycle over and over again.

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  16. Oh that is so sad :( it must be so heartbreaking for you to see this, yet you continue to want to help people like this....you are a very special and kind hearted person, Lynette. xx

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  17. It is so sad...I can't imagine ever abandoning my children, but one never knows what other people think or feel or why they do it. I just always hope that these abandoned children can be placed in loving care and will find their own way to making their lives better!!! GOD bless their little souls! xx

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