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Sunday, June 1, 2014

Some days...

..yup...that is what I want to do, but I don't.

Last Friday evening I walked through the door and a thick, sweet smell hit me as I walked in.  Every inch of my kitchen counters were covered in crates and more crates filled with strawberries, raspberries and blackberries.  B was standing at the stove stirring away at thick red stickiness.  I noticed that the huge pot has already boiled over and the sugary mixture have burned into my glass top stove.  I sigh....

Me:  B, what are you doing?
B:  Ma, I am cooking jam for the Mission.
Me:  Why don't you cook jam on the Mission's gas stoves.
B:  Ma, you know that they have to buy their sugar.
Me:  I know, but so do I and I have to pay for the electricity too. (does she think it comes for free)
B:  Ma, they don't know how...and the children will love berry jam on their sandwiches.
Me:  (Sigh) Okay...just this once.  Next time you let me buy extra sugar for the Mission and then you teach them how to cook jam when they have an excess of fruit. (under my breath...and they can clean up after you messed).

She starts spooning the jam mixture into little glass jars...and I see how she aims and sometimes misses.  It is syrupy jam down the front of my oven, on my floors...across the kitchen counters.  Stefan runs through the house and I see little pink foot prints through the kitchen, the dining room and down the passage. I think to myself, maybe if I just ignore it, it will go away.

The next morning B had gone shopping and when I walk into the kitchen  I first noticed my very dirty stove top and then I noticed that the juice of the fruits had leaked out of the crates and was pooling on the floor.  I HIT THE ROOF!

It is at times like these that I remember that my friends say:  "You are so lucky.  It is awful having an empty nest.  I don't know what to do with my time."  I want to YELL...please let me have an empty nest...just for a while!!!  Let the messes in my home be messes that I actually made.

Yes this is all true.  No I wouldn't want B to move out yet.  She isn't ready and I believe that I am not ready for her to leave our nest either.  I want to know that she will be cared for in the way we cared for her.  So one day...somewhere in my future I will have a clean, neat and tidy house.  One day.

xoxo

30 comments:

  1. I was just thinking the same thing this morning Lynette as I was hovering and washing floors! My house is a permanent mess and I seem to be the only one who minds. It's going to be at least 5 - 10 years I think before my nest is empty as my youngest is only 13, until then I will grit my teeth and keep my tongue still as shouting has never made any difference! Perhaps a tantrum would work better - I'll let you know!!

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  2. Ooooh ... hmmm I don't know, no excuse for leaving a mess. Hope you did not end up cleaning up the mess!

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    1. Partly. I stuck the big sticky pot and all the sticky kitchen utensils into the laundry. K mopped the floors for me and I washed all the counter tops and cleaned my stove. B had to clean the rest when she got home.

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  3. I totally feel your pain ... Adam has always been my 'mess' ... lol ... this too shall pass -- they say :)

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  4. Oh, Lynette! How do I know this .... My daughter and her family (son, husband) live with me while redecorate their apartment (delayed repair - more than a year) Well, shared and feel better!

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  5. Oh my friend. I wish for an empty nest too. Not because of the messes but so that the noise levels can drop. Sjoe. I just need some quiet!
    That said, I LOVE B's heart. And yes, someday. For both of us.

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    1. I love her heart too...but I don't love the messes she creates.

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  6. Ha ha ha ha! I could only notice the good she was doing LOL but yes I agree she should teach the people at the mission how to make jam. I hope she cleaned up later and you didn't have to clean up

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  7. I would have left it and sent her a text... :)

    I have a remarkable ability to ignore messes I haven't made!

    Was the jam good at least?

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    1. I wish I was that way wired. I can't handle living in a mess. My house is open plan and messes cannot be hidden. I cleaned because I actually want to enjoy my house.

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    2. P.S. Yes...the jam was very good.

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  8. Your reaction is perfectly understandable to me.. I love to see my girls cooking at home, but oh how I hate the mess they leave.. Why is that? it is fun to cook and eat, but part of the parcel is the cleaning up after it.. But then it is nice to still have them at home I tell myself.. May you know an EXTRA BIG dollop of grace today!! xx

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    1. I except the EXTRA BIG dollop of grace ♥

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  9. Haha, I think you held out remarkably...I would have had a fit with the mess the day before already.

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    1. What can I say. I got home after 6 o'clock and was so tired that I didn't even have the energy to fight.

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  10. I feel your pain. Amazing that you kept your cool. You're such a GREAT Ma!

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  11. OH I hear you Lynette. I constantly have to fight with my girls when they lived at home, and then the 2 fight who was the last who put away dishes, and when they gone to college, I missed them dearly. Now when they come back different time, the younger one is doing good, I cooked and she will do the dishes. My older girl is now here for a week with her boyfriend, well, she cooks and make the bf do all the dishes but I still have to tell her that she missed the counter and not putting back the baking tray, that how it is, I refused to do it, my husband sometimes did just because he doesn't want Clare and me to "get into a fight" over dishes, but stay firm with my principle, if you used MY kitchen, you gotta to clean up the way I want it period! Big hug to you!

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    1. My daughter has the evenings that she has her turn to cook. Same thing. She love the cooking part....the cleaning part...not so much :-/

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  12. Haar hart is op die regte plek. Net soos haar ma s'n xxx

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  13. Ah yes, I think all mom's have had these moments. Our children were younger at the time, but I so clearly remember an incident of a checking on a "napping" child to find my MIL's pure white spare bedroom covered in red lipstick. Our Lord blessed and we got it all off the walls, and out of the bedspread, carpet, and chair pad. I was never so mortified, but look back on it with a smile now. Thanks for sharing the ups and downs of life. ~ Blessings, Tracey

    Garden of Grace

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    1. Tracey...don't we all know those moments. When B was a toddler I woke up one moment. She had gotten up and was playing next to the bed...with my face cream...she had rubbed an entire container of cream into her hair....there will never be any wrinkles there :-P

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  14. This sounds all too familiar Lynette. I have constant arguments with my daughter over leaving a mess in the kitchen. Most of the time, I will just clean it up as I can't live with it. My hubby is very strict though and will insist that I leave it and make her do it when she gets back from wherever she is. I just want to keep the peace as I think my nest won't be empty for at least the next 5 years! She has a heart of gold and makes up for it in so many other ways. :) xx

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    1. I nag and nag...and then I get irritated with myself. I don't want to be a nag.

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  15. Deep breaths! Ai, I would just phone her to come straight back and clean up if at all possible. And seriously gas is so much cheaper to especially cook jam on. But yes, great to have her there. I hear you. I am trying to teach the kids to clean as they go but do you thin I have a chance this will ever stick? I wonder

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    1. It will stick one day...when they live in their own homes.

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  16. LOL...well, I shouldn't, but I am. Reading all the comments & your replies is as good as the original story. I'd give a LOT to have a daughter to roll my eyes [& sometimes fists] at!!!! Hope they enjoy their jam sandwiches;)!!!

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    1. My friend I promise you she is an eye roller...but I guess she learned it from me.

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  17. LOL....Lynette...the joys and the sorrows...all rolled into one! That's just how a household is...sometimes it's all fun and laughter and sometimes tears too. I have also given up on a tidy house (mostly) with a boy and 2 dogs and hubby....but then other days I also have a moan and groan. Weekends are the worst...I want to just chill and then end up also cleaning and picking up...after everyone else! Amazing how we women can't stand the mess and the others don't even see it! ;-)

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  18. I don't know whether to laugh or cry on this one! Kids can be so frustrating at times!! I am OCD about mess so it's difficult for me to bear - I have no problem with anyone making a mess as long as ALL traces of it are gone before they leave the room LOL

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  19. Oh, I am hearing you on all fronts! I too get frustrated that I'm constantly cleaning other people's messes! And that for some reason, I am the only one in a house of 4 who can use a vacuum, sweep a floor, empty a dishwasher, clean a shower etc etc etc. Yet id be a little lost if they lived elsewhere.... but just a day or two here n there without their messes to contend with would be rather nice. I hope the jam was enjoyed and appreciated :)

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