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Friday, July 30, 2010

Disillusionment


How do you react when you are disillusioned and disappointed?  Do you give in to cynicism and get bitter, critical and judgemental?  You know, I have often wondered whether I set standards that are too high for my loved ones to attain.  Yesterday I was left in total despair when I found that I have been deceived by a loved one. My first reaction was to lash out and I could feel bitterness rise up in my heart.  When you have invested all your love, time and attention in a loved one and they turn around and go in exactly the opposite direction that you taught them, disillusionment sets in....you don't see the bigger picture and it becomes a personal hurt and your natural instinct is to judge.

Oi, the Lord has sorted me out in no time and I had to get my heart out of this mess quickly!  This was today's devotional in "My Utmost for His Highest".  (again it is a lengthy piece...but please read it...there is a point to it)

"Disillusionment means having no more misconceptions, false impressions, and false judgments in life; it means being free from these deceptions.  However, though no longer deceived, our experience of disillusionment may actually leave us cynical and overly critical in our judgment of others.  But the disillusionment that comes from God brings us to the point where we see people as they really are, yet without any cynicism or any stinging and bitter criticism.  Many of the things in life that inflict the greatest injury, grief, or pain, stem from the fact that we suffer from illusions.  We are not true to one another, seeing each other as we really are; we are only true to our misconceived ideas of one another.  According to our thinking, everything is either delightful and good, or it is evil, malicious and cowardly.

Refusing to be disillusioned is the cause of much of the suffering of human life. And this is how that suffering happens— if we love someone, but do not love God, we demand total perfection and righteousness from that person, and when we do not get it we become cruel and vindictive; yet we are demanding of a human being something which he or she cannot possibly give. There is only one Being who can completely satisfy to the absolute depth of the hurting human heart, and that is the Lord Jesus Christ. Our Lord is so obviously uncompromising with regard to every human relationship because He knows that every relationship that is not based on faithfulness to Himself will end in disaster. Our Lord trusted no one, and never placed His faith in people, yet He was never suspicious or bitter. Our Lord’s confidence in God, and in what God’s grace could do for anyone, was so perfect that He never despaired, never giving up hope for any person. If our trust is placed in human beings, we will end up despairing of everyone."

Thank you Lord, for bringing sanity to this situation.

I phoned my loved one this morning.  "I want you to know that although you chose to.........and I don't approve, it does not mean that I love you less.  My love for you is unconditional and I will never reject you.  Please remember that if you need me you need only pick up the phone and call...I will always be there for you."

Just knowing that for every hurt, disappointment and problem, our Lord has the answer...gives so much peace.

xxx

15 comments:

  1. now this is something to think about, this is so true lynette,thanks for sharing some more inspiration from what you have experienced:)

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  2. thank you soooo much for this post, just what i needed to hear!
    take care
    k
    xx

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  3. You have a way of being so "together" and able to do so much when you go through what life throws your way. Its inspiratinal for me so thank you. Prayers & hugs.

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  4. indeed, disillusionment is a slippery slope to cynicism (for me) and I have to take it by the horns and deal early otherwise the rot sets in! Thanks for this post. xx

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  5. Great post and one I am sure we would all like to have written.

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  6. I am following your blog, Lynette and i can understand how u feel... U r doing the right thing.. May God grant u wisdom and strength..

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  7. Thanks so much for this awesome post, Lynette!
    You're inspiring me.
    Blessings,
    B xx

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  8. You a MUCH better person than me!!!!

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  9. Lynette - your faith is unwavering and to me, it is inspirational!
    Big hugs my friend x-x

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  10. "our experience of disillusionment may actually leave us cynical and overly critical in our judgment of others" - I can SOOOO relate to that! I think with loved ones it's the hardest b/c you do indeed feel betrayed. And our natural instinct is to shut ourselves off, and thus shut them out, in order to protect ourselves thru some demented self preservation.

    One thing I started doing is praying for anyone I meet that the Lord would reveal the true "essence of their character" to me. I've prayed that things would work out well with that person (be it a romantic interest, a budding friendship, a friendship developing for my children), but yes, "man" has always let me done & left me disappointed. God has not. He is faithful every time. Even when I so desperately wanted something to develop with that person b/c I really liked them, one their "true" character was revealed (which doesn't take much time, quite honestly), I can see that it was the Lord protecting me from future troubles & pain. But this helps us incredibly to still love unconditionally...knowing that we rest in His arms, so that we can continue to lean on & trust in Him in all things!

    You did the right thing in calling to convey the depths of your feelings. Unconditional love is just that...unconditional...thru all the hurts, disappointments, and quite frankly, STUPID decisions other people make (or ok...let's say it...sometimes that WE make). And I think this just shows us that we are ALL fallible. There is only ONE source of perfect love. But ya know what...even He disappoints us sometimes, doesn't He? And we become disillusioned with Him. It's the human condition. But again, He is ALWAYS faithful to reveal that it was to our benefit that things didn't go our way. (I've been there many times)

    Hugs to you ~ Merana

    PS - just shows that He's with you in the storm that THAT was your devotional for the day. :o)

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  11. I think you are the bravest woman i know.

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  12. Hi Lynette, sorry to hear about this loved one. Your post made me think that this may be the exact way God feels about his own children. Just as you have been hurt, he too is hurt when his children go the opposite direction than to him. But he loves us regardless and forgives no matter what. I will be praying for you :o)

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  13. Just checking in to see how you doing? Thinking of you.

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  14. thinking of you too ... bless your heart, God will honor you just as you have choosen to be so unconditional. I've got lots to learn from you ...

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  15. You are getting wiser. We are learning the true meaning of Love through you!
    Best of wishes!
    (I know that you will look back on this on day and be thankful for it! :D)

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