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Friday, March 6, 2009

An emotional rollercoaster

Just in case you did not know it. I very seldom lose my cool, I always appear to be cool, calm and collected and very seldom speak out in anger or say something hurtful. It is not very often that things happen that I allow to rustle my feathers.

Yesterday was a day so full of emotions that it is difficult to describe how I feel right now...other than emotionally drained...thank heavens it is Friday and at the end of this day I will be able to recharge my batteries.

For the past 2 months we have been under incredible attack in our ministry. We care for 480 people (provide accommodation for them, meals, and meet most of their needs) Now 1 person is hell bent on destroying us and the ministry. He has tried the avenues of the media, police, labour, Revenue service and is now contacting our benefactors in his efforts to destroy that which was built up in the past 10+ years. With our country's human rights laws we are finding it very difficult to get rid of him. A calendar months notice was ignored and now we have to go the route of an eviction order. In this two months we have still treated him with respect and although he is verbally abusive and obnoxious we have never lashed out in anger....the closest was yesterday when I told him that he was rebelling not against us but against the Lord, as the Centre belongs to Him. (I wanted to throttle him...the arrogant little man - you see their goes my fruit...)

Yesterday afternoon I was relaxing and when I passed my daughters room she was lying on the floor having a seizure....the first time since she was put on anti seizure medication. I can't explain to you how it feels to see that. The first time it happened (4 years ago) I was filled with such fear, she was going blue and I thought that we were loosing her.... Yesterday it was just a total helplessness. All I could do was sit next to her and wipe her face with a wet cloth. I am honest that in times like that I go blank and I cannot even call on the Lord for help. (I know... totally pathetic)

When the spasms left her body and she went quiet...I looked into her big open blue eyes, staring blankly back at me, and only then could I pray the Lords protection over her. After a seizure she is totally out of it for around 40 minutes and loses all memory of what happened in the hours prior to the seizure. When she went for a MRI 4 years ago they found a lesion on her right temporal lobe....damage done when she had meningitis as a 9 month baby. Now it is back to the neurologist to find out whether her medication has to be adjusted. This morning she was off to college, looking very pale and with a very swollen tongue. (she did quite a bit of damage biting her tongue....and no....the story that they could swollow it is just that... A STORY!)

Speak to you again soon.

xoxo

19 comments:

  1. You must feel as though a tsunami has hit you, Lynette!

    My heart goes out to you and we will be praying for you all.

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  2. Thank you Allie...your kindness has just reduced me to tears...something else I DON'T DO!

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  3. Oh Lynette, my heart goes out to you.

    Thank heavens your daughter is OK this morning.

    You, your family and your ministry are in my thoughts & prayers this morning.

    xxx

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  4. Lynette, I am so sorry to hear about your ordeals at the moment. Having met you and your hubby, I know that your strength and faith will carry you through this difficult times.

    Witnessing a someone having seizure is an awful experience and it is probably even worse and more worrying seeing that happen with someone so near and dear to you. I trust that the medication can be adjusted with a positive effect.

    You need to stay strong now for those around you.

    Hugs from Desire

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  5. Oh I'm so sorry that things are so overwhelming for you right now. I know exactly what you mean as I am also Mrs. Cool, but this year has already been so trying...try to remember that the arrogant man is just Satan's vessel & it is not the man you need to fight. Hope you get some answers soon re: your daughter's medication. I can just imagine how hard it must have been to witness that but at least you were there for her ;-)

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  6. Lynette--My heart is hurting for you right now. What a day! I'm so sorry for the frustrations you have to deal with in your ministry, and for the scariness of your daughter's seizure. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

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  7. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers Lynette. Have a good weekend!

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  8. Lynette, thank you for sharing that. I will pray for your family and your ministry.
    Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God"

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  9. Lynette, Praying for you, your daughter and your ministry. God will lift you up even in those times you can't find the words to pray. He knows your heart.
    Your friend in Texas,
    Lisa

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  10. oh my goodness! I am so sorry for all you have dealt with in the past few days. You will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers! God is bigger than everyone and everything and will not allow this "man" to destroy his children's work!

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  11. Lynette I just prayed for your daughter and the ministry you are a part of! You have had a tough time!!!

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  12. We are totally praying for her! I am so so sorry you and her have to go through that! We will pray for God's healing, and for strength for you all!
    You a great mommy! You did the best you could do... that is to PRAY! Much love!

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  13. Lynette, you're in my thoughts!
    Hugs,
    Debbie

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  14. Thinking of you and your family.

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  15. Hi Lynette. I thought it was time to give you a visit and I am glad that I did. Girl, what you need is a great big HUG. What is his problem?......some people just don't get it.

    I also read your previous post (first paragraph) and I TOTALLY know where you are coming from.

    Hope today, tomorrow and the next are super ones for you.

    Cheers, Irene :)

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  16. So sorry I am late in reading this. My heart goes out to you for your emotional turmoil. I am glad you are feeling better. I will pray for your ministry and your daughter. (And hang in there with the dial-up!)

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  17. WOW....I am praying for your daughter and for your ministry...it always seems to happen all at once. Hopefully the meds will just need to be adjusted...something I'm sure you have dealt with before. I'm praying for peace, love and calmness in your lives...you are doing such an important job as mother, friend and minister to our people...your faith will get you thru all of these bumps in the road.

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  18. Prayerfully this situation has gotten better. I hope so! The Lord will fight or you! Psalms 13 is a great one.

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